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All-Ireland Final Banter

1:02:21 recording · EN · 3 speakers

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Brief overview

A Dublin All-Ireland Final podcast that ignores the GAA to riff on Tom Cruise and the World Cup.

  1. GAA billing is a joke, not a topicHiggins is introduced as a GAA pundit on All-Ireland Final day and the football never comes up.
  2. Second-hand Tom Cruise lore carries the middleKite-surf lessons, ditched security and the re-ordered Indian meal, all presented as rumour.
  3. The hour ends on comedy shop talkEdinburgh Fringe dates, the last run of Cruel Little Man, and Barcelona's four tickets sold in week one.
Executive Summary AI
  • Recorded in Dublin on All-Ireland Football Final day, the hosts bring on comedian Christopher Higgins, introduced as a huge and fellow GAA pundit, and then never discuss the match.0:00
  • One host, newly cast in a show about care work for adults with additional needs, relays that a catering-truck worker told a table of about 20 cast and crew she was an extra in a porno in Ibiza at 17 because they offered her biscuits.7:48
  • The Tom Cruise stretch collects second-hand rumours flagged as rumour: a kite-surf instructor near Clearwater said Cruise ditched his security on a motorcycle, and on a film shoot he made the whole cast order and eat the same big Indian meal again immediately after finishing it.16:10
  • A host says he was called woke and got heavy abuse online three weeks earlier for saying the Reform party are far right, and admits he laughed at a headline reporting Anne Whittakin was hit in the head with a hammer 21 times while eating lunch.21:42
  • On the World Cup they call the final the worst game of football in the history of the world, mock a halftime show with Madonna at 70 driven in a buggy by Ronaldo and Ronaldinho and a Tom Cruise speech, and relay Wayne Rooney telling the BBC panel he thought it was crap.35:50
Key Quote
“Yeah, it sucks being us sometimes.”
— Christopher Higgins43:21
Key Quote
“All tickets at mybudchris.com.”
— Christopher Higgins59:21
Key Quote
“Barcelona, stop making me look like a cunt, please.”
— Vito1:00:01