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Last Days with My Guru

29:11 recording · EN · 3 speakers

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Brief overview

Yogananda finally hears his guru say he loves him, then loses him.

  1. The guru said it once, then said it againAfter years of unspoken affection Sri Yukteswar answers, Yogananda, I love you, always.
  2. Paramahansa given as the task is handed overThe new title formally supersedes Swami, and with it comes charge of the ashrams and the organization.
  3. Every hint of the passing was given in advanceI shall go to Kirupur no more, the estate arrangements, and Babaji's message all preceded March.
Executive Summary AI
  • At the Serampore hermitage Yogananda presses Sri Yukteswar to say aloud what he has shown in silence, and his guru answers that he had yearned for a son to train in the yogic path and found one in him.
  • At the winter solstice festival Yogananda is asked to address the brother disciples in English, and pays tribute to the guidance that stayed with him through fifteen years in America.
  • The next afternoon Sri Yukteswar bestows the monastic title of Paramahansa, superseding Swami, tells Yogananda his own task on earth is finished, and settles his estate so relatives cannot litigate over the two hermitages, which he deeds to charitable purposes.
  • While Yogananda is away at the Kumbha Mela in Allahabad and Vrindaban, Swami Keshavananda delivers a message Babaji gave him in a Himalayan cave: that Babaji will not meet Yogananda this time but on some other occasion.
  • A March 8th telegram calls him to Puri, where his eighty-one-year-old guru has already left the body; Yogananda conducts the rites on March 10th and the Amrita Bazaar Patrika reports the passing and names him successor.
Key Quote
“Do you realize that once only, on the day of meeting, have you ever said, I love you?”
— Yogananda
Key Quote
“Yogananda, I love you, always.”
— Sri Yukteswar
Key Quote
“Your answer is my passport to heaven.”
— Yogananda

Transcript

0:00 CHAPTER XLII. AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A YOGI. her. Last days with my guru. Guruji, I am glad to find you alone this morning. I had just arrived
0:29 at the Sarampur Hermitage, carrying a fragrant burden of fruit and roses. Sri Yukteswar glanced
0:36 at me meekly. What is your question? Master looked about the room as though he was seeking escape.
0:43 Guruji, I came to you as a high school youth.
0:47 Now I am a grown man, even with a grey hair or two, though you have showered me with silent
0:52 affection from the first hour to this.
0:54 Do you realize that once only, on the day of meeting, have you ever said, I love you?
1:01 I looked at him pleadingly.
1:03 Master lowered his gaze.
1:10 Yogananda, must I bring out into the cold realms of speech the warm sentiments best guarded by the wordless heart?
1:14 Guruji, I know you love me,
1:16 but my mortal ears ache to hear you say so.
1:20 Be it as you wish.
1:21 During my married life I often yearned for a son
1:24 to train in the yogic path.
1:26 But then you came into my life.
1:28 I was content.
1:30 In you I have found my son.
1:32 Two clear tear-drops stood in Sri Yukteswar's eyes.
1:36 Yogananda, I love you, always.
1:39 Your answer is my passport to heaven.
1:41 I felt a weight lift from my heart, dissolved forever at his words. Often had
1:46 I wondered at his silence, realizing that he was unemotional and self-contained, yet sometimes I
1:53 feared I had been unsuccessful in fully satisfying him. His was a strange nature, never utterly to
1:59 be known, a nature deep and still, unfathomable to the outer world whose values he had long transcended a few days later thought i detected a pleased twinkle in his eyes then came a talk before the alumni of serampore college as i gazed upon my old classmates and as they gazed on their own mad monk unashamedly my silver-tongued professor of philosophy dr gursal came forward to greet me all are past misunderstandings dissolved by the alchemist time
2:51 a winter solstice festival was celebrated at the end of december in the serampo hermitage as always sri yukteswar's disciples gathered from far and near devotional sankirtans solos in the nectar-sweet voice of Kristo Da, a
3:07 feast served by young disciples, Master's profoundly moving discourse under the stars
3:12 in the thronged courtyard of the ashram, memories, memories, joyous festivals of years long past.
3:20 Tonight, however, there was to be a new feature.
3:23 Yogananda, please address the assemblage in english master's eyes were twinkling as he made this doubly unusual request was he thinking of the shipboard predicament that had preceded my first lecture in english
3:36 i told the story to my audience of brother disciples ending with a fervent tribute to our guru his omnipresent guidance was with me not alone on the ocean steamer, I concluded, but daily
3:48 throughout my fifteen years in the vast and hospitable land of America.
3:53 After the guests had departed, Sri Yukteswar called me to the same bedroom where once only,
4:00 after a festival of my early years, I had been permitted to sleep on his wooden bed.
4:05 Tonight my guru was sitting there quietly, a semicircle of disciples at his feet he smiled as i quickly entered the room
4:12 yogananda are you leaving now for calcutta please return here tomorrow i have certain things to tell you the next afternoon with a few simple words of blessing sri y Yukteswar bestowed on me the further monastic
4:26 title of Paramahansa. It now formally supersedes your former title of Swami, he said as I knelt
4:33 before him. With a silent chuckle I thought of the struggle which my American students would
4:39 undergo over the pronunciation of Paramahansaji. My task on earth is now finished you must carry on master spoke quietly his eyes calm and gentle my heart was palpitating in fear please send someone to take charge of our ashram in puri sri uttaswa went on you will be able to successfully sail the boat of your life and that of the organization details of settling his estate. He was anxious to
5:26 prevent the possibility of litigation by relatives after his death, per possession of his two

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